Still can't bear to clear out their rooms....

My daughter's been back at uni for three weeks now, but I still can't bear to empty her ashtray. It sits in a corner of the kitchen,  conjuring up an instant reminder of her sitting there playing the guitar and chatting and generally hanging about.  I know it sounds sluttish, and even I can see that old fag ends are disgusting. And of course I wish she didn't smoke. But......
  I haven't tidied her room either.  My eldest's room is full of junk too, and he moved out eight years ago!  Even though I'd love his room to work in, or make it nice for visitors - even another lodger! -  I just can't bear to ask him to clear it out. When that happens it will be a breakthrough of sorts, but in the meantime I suppose I'll just carry on shoving his stuff into a corner.